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Thoughts to Ponder...

*I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day.
And tomorrow isn't looking good either.

*I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

*Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.

*Young at Heart. Slightly Older in Other Places.

*Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I
 thought to myself, "Where the hell is the ceiling?!"

*Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I will show
 you a  man who can't get his pants off!

*We have a strange and wonderful relationship. You're strange and I'm
wonderful, or should that be I'm strange and you're wonderful?

*Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid doing altogether.

*If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

*It's gonna be like threading a needle with a haystack.

*The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win,
you're still a rat.

*Am I getting smart with you? ....How would you know?

*Not one shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is
serious.

*The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

*I put the "fun" in dysfunctional.

*Life is like a box of chocolates. It's full of nuts.

*All I ask is that you treat me no differently than you would the Queen.

*Does "anal retentive" have a hyphen?

*I get plenty of exercise -- jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck,
 and dodging deadlines.

*Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won't spoil me.

*Does vacuuming count as Aerobic Exercise?

*I have not yet begun to procrastinate.

*I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

*I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

*Just remember, no matter where you go, there you are. --

*It is much easier to apologize than to ask permission.

*There are two rules for ultimate success in life. 1. Never tell
everything you know.

*Just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean they're NOT out to get
you................

*I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

*When I get to where I'm going, will somebody please tell me where I am?

*Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

*Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste
good with ketchup.

*Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

*The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

*Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will Whiz
on your computer.

*Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.

12 natural laws of the Universe , 13 Goals of a Witch , I am Pagan , Colbrens of the Bards , A Pledge to Pagan Spirituality , 8 Keys to Celtic Magick , I've Learned , A Creed to Live By , Mayan Code of Honor , Pentagram Model , The Script that Works Wonders , Hopi Prayer of Compassion , Steps to Happiness , Thoughts to Ponder , Ancient Wisdoms , Symptoms of Inner Peace , Principles for Better Living , Ways to Enhance your Spiritual Awareness , The Be Attitudes
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